The terrorism of too much.

Part of me wants to focus on more long form and research driven articles but everything is going so fast the prospect of setting aside a week to chop down anything more considered than ten or fifteen minutes just seems like a mistake and maybe dangerous. Diving into a research library or down a rabbit hole of some kind for a week is liable to have me waking up one day to find the world burned down without me.

Several times I’ve started pieces only to realize it’s irrelevant because two days later everything changed. This struggle, I’m sure, exists everywhere but usually you can tune most things out - with the relative certainty the world won’t actually crumble while you aren’t looking - and get real work done.

This is madness and I can’t escape the sense - a definite awareness - that the rapid-fire nature is intended to distract from their core goal. Until now the ultimate purpose of this chaos, of project 2025, of Yarvinist philosophy, of Russian orthodox oligarchy… has been hazy but legible. Lately the picture is coming into focus.

I’m a very small fish. But I’m a very small fish with a lot of good hunches and deep hate for fascism, oligarchy, imperialism and the smash and grab capitalism propping it up.

People, everyone, should be given the capacity, by virtue of our ethical alignment, to improve their lives without decades of being strung along by the banal money hoarding minority.

I don’t know how the next few months will turn out any more than the next person. I can’t actually read Putin’s mind. Or Stupid Mussolini. Or SpecialKKK.

I don’t know if I’m even safe. We live in a time where people are being disappeared.

I feel compelled to stay and fight. I feel compelled to be a voice in the darkness. I feel compelled to do as much as is necessary to wrench our democracy away from the clutches of a global fascist conspiracy. I feel compelled to try but small fish are small fish. Edible.

I know only too well how quick to violence and morally corrupt white supremacy is. It has come for me in the past. It will again. It will hurt anyone it has to. You mistake them for Americans. They hate America.

They idolize authoritarianism and enjoy hurting people. It’s that simple. That can’t be allowed to rule the world.

I don’t have a lot of resources. It’s perhaps just a bad idea to keep going. I lose support every time I make a full post but I need you to hear. It is so hard to turn back. I don’t know how.

The last few months have been the first time in a long time, since the end of the first term of terror, I am genuinely afraid. Many of the things Trump has done, in isolation, aren’t world shaking. Some are but many aren’t. In combination, the world is in abjectly new territory and it stinks of Hitler particles everywhere.

What capability I do have is limited. I don’t know how to earn your support in a greater sense than to just do the work. So, for now, that’s the plan.